30-Day Marketing Challenge: What's stopping you?

I read this week about a writer I really respect who's stopped querying story ideas because the market is so unreliable right now. She has a point. You don't know who's taking queries and who's not these days. Ducking and weaving and putting that much effort into a query when you see markets drying up can get... exhausting. Really exhausting.

As a result, I've noticed a little slide in my querying: I'm sticking to markets that I know still have money--but they don't pay very well.

Then I look at my income goals and my projections and my throat tightens up a little bit. Serenity it's not.

So before we end this marketing challenge, I want to issue a specific challenge: Send the big queries to the higher paying markets anyway. No matter what. Let them tell you that they aren't taking queries, or that they're sticking to their regular stable of writers. Don't make the decision for them by not sending the query.

I want to share both my self-limiting underlying belief and a means to cope with it today.

The belief: Take my toys and go.
When I was in high school, I was always in classes with teachers that had my straight-A sister the year before. My mother was a teacher in the school district, and my father used to work in the district office, and ocassionally took us to the giant room where wall-size computers calculated our standardized tests. You could say I felt a lot of pressure to perform.

How did I cope? I didn't try. I got Cs and Bs, and convinced myself that I was too cool for this class, or that I didn't care about the subject matter. I was sure that when I loved it, I would try.

The truth was that I was so hyper-competitive that if I didn't think I would be the best--beat my sister, get the best score in the class--I wouldn't try. I'd take my toys and go home.

Now it's 20 years later and I find myself struggling with marketing. It's not that I think my ideas are poor. But are they good enough? It's not that I question my ability to find markets. It's that I can't be guaranteed of a sale. My impulse is not to try.

A version of this is always one of the first complaints I hear from new freelancers. They can't stomach the idea of spending all this time on a query without a guarantee of a sale. So they don't try. I'm trying, but I'm sticking to what seems like a sure bet.

In this economy the pool of sure bets are getting smaller and smaller. And that approach no longer works.

A tool for coping: A daily decision.
This week, it's really been working for me to set aside that fear by asking myself every day:

Do I want to be in this business today?

If I do, then I need to act like I want to be in this business. And acting like I want to be in this business means acting like I want to stay in this business.

That means querying the scary markets, the unsure things: Sending the feature query instead of the front-of-the-book piece. Sending a cold pitch and calling new-to-me markets. It means taking risks with no promise of rewards.

It means not giving up without a fight.

So I urge you to fight: Whatever your resistance, whatever your fear, don't let it hold you back. Decide to be in the fight today.

Photo by lanulop.

30-Day Organizing Challenge: Day 2 Part 2

Let's add another goal as we start this challenge: Make a deal with yourself

When I think of organizing, I think of drill sergeants. It might be the result of regular cleaning binges after long, frustrating standoffs between my dad's (and, okay, my) obsessive collecting and piling of things on any horizontal surface in my family home and my mother's desire to have a place clean enough for friends to pop in. Finally at her wit's end after months of polite requests that my dad, my sister and I put stuff away, my mother would stand in the middle of the chaos, fists on her hips as she barked orders for where to put this pile and how to sort that pile.

So, yeah. Organizing. Good times.

My point is that starting this kind of organizing venture can be done gently and lovingly, towards ourselves and everyone else involved. We can cultivate forgiveness for our resistance and applaud ourselves for the small steps we take in the direction of a cleaner, more organized space.

So let's all agree to a few things right now:

We will not do this perfectly.
We will not cover every organizing problem you have in the next 30 days.
We will not emerge from this challenge wholely calm and thrilled with our space.

What we will do is learn a little something about why we don't organize and a few tricks to make organizing a little simpler and a little less painful.

Deal?

Serenity Tip: Working Toward Sustainability

Sustainability is one of those words that's starting to get a bad rap. Read it now, and there's almost a Pavlovian response: eco, green, kitchen grease powering your car... (not that there's anything wrong with that).

But I want to talk about it from a different perspective. For something to be sustainable, it has to be sane, somewhat moderate and have the ability to be self-perpetuating. In a way, this is another definition of serenity.

Take a look at your work life: In this culture, most of us are encouraged to take part in behaviors that are not really self-perpetuating. I talked to a freelance friend the other day who goes through these cycles: Incredibly productive, working 10 hour days and taking a few hours off on the weekends, getting a lot done, making deadlines, making money. And then she crashes, and can't work for weeks.

Everything is big: Big work, big rest. As a self-employed person you may be familiar with this cycle. And there's something natural about boom and bust cycles, even when it comes to productivity and energy.

But. There is another way.

This gets to that other dreaded buzz word: "balance." Balance can be a bludgeon people use to harangue those of us who put work first. But instead, think about it this way:

* How do you really want to spend your time?
* How are you spending your time?
* What parts of your life give you the most joy?

It could be that the answers to those three things are all completely different. Or it could be that they're pretty well in line.

Then ask yourself:

* How can I sustain those things I love doing?

For work, that could be nurturing your relationship with clients you particularly enjoy working with or who assign you projects that are really fulfilling.

And then there's the other part of sustainability, which is financial:

* How much money do you need to support those values and sustain them?

That means money for trips to see far-flung loved ones, or money to support the volunteer work you love. Or it means attracting high-enough-paying clients to knock off work at 5 o'clock every night. Or taking a month off every six months to recharge your batteries.

What does sustainability look like for you?

The scary part of looking at this stuff is that it forces your to get clarity about what all your expenses actually are. It can be a shock: How much does it really cost, if you're Christian, to buy all those Christmas presents, to attend your loved ones' weddings, to go on that romantic vacation with your partner? And then how much time does it take to sustain friendships and love relationships?

Put those together and you have a new way of figuring your minimum hourly income: Divide the amount of money you need to support the life you want ongoing, by the time you need to set aside for work after you account for the time you need for things outside work.

Is that number realistic?

Before you run off and find a full time job, it's possible that it's more possible than you think. You don't need to achieve it right now, but it's a goal, just like your monthly income targets and your target clients. Let it be there, and see where you can make just a little more of it work in your real life.

Serenity Tip: Facing Procrastination

We've all done it: We've cruised around our favorite message boards and silly Web sites, organized our desk, done laundry--anything but the task in front of us.

And then, if you're the least bit conscientious, you spend another few hours beating yourself for your lost productivity. Obviously, this can kill your serenity, and become an endless cycle.

So my gentle nudge of the day is to embrace your procrastination.

There are a few reasons to do this: First, if you're in a creative field, chances are your procrastination is part of your process. I have to constantly remind myself can also be another way of saying that I'm working out fine points or organizing thoughts subconsciously. It'll pass.

Second, and perhaps most importantly, if you don't accept it, your resistance will be worse than the procrastination itself.

So how do you get comfortable with it--and then overcome it? Start by getting to know why you're resisting in the first place. What's the fear? What's the anxiety?

Face it. And then assess what's realistic. It may also help to track your time to see what's taking you the longest and how you're really spending your time. You may find that what feels like procrastination to you is actually a reasonable amount of time to spend taking care of other, important items, like your spirituality or admin work.

If you find you still can't get yourself to work, procrastination might be a serious problem for you. In that case, consider these tips care of Procrastinators Anonymous:

Break It Down: Break down projects into specific action steps; include preparation tasks in the breakdown.

Visualization: Plan what to do, then imagine yourself doing it. The more specific and vivid your visualization, the better. See yourself doing the task, and doing it well.

Focus on Long-Term Consequences: Procrastinators have a tendency to focus on short-term pleasure, and shut out awareness of long-term consequences. Remind yourself how panicked and awful you'll feel if the task isn't done, then imagine how good it will feel when the task is finished.

Avoid Time Bingeing: One reason procrastinators dread starting is that once they start they don't let themselves stop. Plan to work on a task for a defined period of time, then set a timer. When the timer goes off, you're done.

Use Small Blocks of Time: Procrastinators often have trouble doing tasks in incremental steps, and wait for big blocks of time that never come. When you have small blocks of time, use them to work on the task at hand.

Avoid Perfectionism: Procrastinators have a tendency to spend more time on a task than it warrants, so tasks that should be quick to do take an agonizingly long time. Notice this tendency and stop yourself. Some things require completion, not perfection.

Develop Routines: To help structure your day and make a habit of things you always need to do, develop routines for what you do when you wake up, regular tasks of your workday, and what you need to do before going to bed.

Bookend Tasks and Time: Use the Bookending board on the P.A. Web site to check in throughout the day, or at the beginning or end of specific tasks you are dreading.

Serenity Tip: Just Do It

When I started meditating three years ago, I was having a very hard time getting myself to start. I wanted candles lit, a single rose in a vase near the candles, the perfect meditation chair and a clean, quiet place in which to meditate. And I wanted to do it for 30 minutes at a time.

Then a very wise friend of mine said to me: "Heather, sit down, shut up and close your eyes for two minutes!"

Thus began my daily practice. There are no candles in bed. The room where I meditate is usually a mess. I don't have flowers in my meditation room (which doubles as my office). But I do it. Sometimes, when I'm really in the groove, I get 25 minutes in. Sometimes, when I'm agitated or in a hurry, I do five minutes. Usually, like today, I get in 15 minutes.

So start the year this way: Whatever practice you keep promising yourself you'll do, just start it. Drop what you're doing right now and do it for two minutes: Maybe it's marketing you hate, but need to get into the practice of it. Maybe it's meditation or yoga. Just try it. For two minutes. Then stop. Don't overwhelm yourself. Save up the excitement of having started for tomorrow's two minutes.

Eventually it will grow, and become a practice. But right now, just do it.

Righting the Resistance

Yesterday, I wrote about how having a business plan can create serenity. But anyone who's ever contemplated actually putting a business plan into action knows it's not that simple.

The first lesson in getting to serenity is that it doesn't feel serene at first. Far from it.

After creating my business plan--which includes amazingly abundant things like an income goal beyond what I've ever earned, treating myself to ergonomic office equipment and moving in with my beloved--my body pushed back. I felt fluish. My throat swelled. I was sleepy. I couldn't concentrate. Worst of all, my work suffered.

I fretted: Can I really do it? Can I pull this off long-term? What if I fail? What if I'm humiliated? What if this proves that I've been a fraud all along?

Now, if I simply reacted to this distress, I might think I was pushing too hard, too fast. I might think, "Let's not set such an ambitious income goal. Let's leave it up to the freelancing gods." I might take care of myself by not taking care of my true needs.

Luckily, I'm working on a story about how the impostor syndrome can cripple one's career. Thank you, freelance gods.

So I didn't take it too seriously, but I did take my anxiety seriously enough to ask:

* Where do these fears originate?
* Is there anything I can learn from them?
* Are they realistic?
* What will happen if I "fail" to reach my income and other goals?

The answer? My fears aren't realistic. Sure, I could fail, but I'd be no worse off than I am right now--and I'm doing pretty well right now. And most important, I relaxed into this knowledge:

Guess what? Whatever it is that you've been longing for? This is how you get it.

That pain? That feeling of coming out of your skin, that dramatic, "I couldn't possibly do that!" feeling?

Well, have your Norma Desmond moment, and then remember: This is what it feels like to stretch the serenity muscle, making it stronger and more flexible for the next time you want to grow your business.

How do you deal with resistance to growing your business?