Serenity Tip: Doing What You Have To, Giving Yourself What You Need

You may have noticed radio silence from me over the past week or so. An odd thing happened at the end of the blogathon. I was plum out of energy. After filing a big story last week, then my birthday, and then a little break between assignments, I found myself with free time.

My usual approach is to keep working full days. After all, there's always something to do:

• Scanning and shredding of old documents and useless receipts.
• Reading other great blogs.
• Meeting with other writers and editors.
• Following up on invoices.
• Reading great journalism.
• Going through my stack of business cards and updating my address book.
• Decluttering.
• Revising my business plan.
• Checking to be sure the links on my Web site are updated.

And of course, and perhaps most important, querying for more work.

One of my coaching clients has said that she has found, in the time between assignments, that life encroaches. It sure does.

But what I decided to do was something that seemed sane but never occurred to me before: I worked half days. I let myself sleep in every day (that extra hour of sleep is life-giving), and when I got up I sent a query. Then I did whatever else I wanted. I went to the gym. I went shopping (birthday gift certificates in hand). I read a guilty-pleasure book. I called friend.

And I capped it off with a weekend out of town that consisted mostly of soaking in a hot tub while reading.

And I'm here to tell you that the world did not fall apart. In fact, I came back and the first thing I did after saying hello to the kittens was finally throw out a bunch of old magazines that I'd been vacillating on keeping for months.

Amazing how inspiration strikes at the right time.

You may be in a slow period, and if you, like me, are a workaholic, consider a contrary action: Do what absolutely has to get done. Then get out of the office and enjoy your life.

If, on the other hand, you have a hard time getting started, please don't take this post as permission to put off your work to another day. The key is contrary action: Doing something against instinct. It can be healing. It was for me this week.

Photo by m o d e.

Health Insurance Bonus: Insurance language red flags

Recently, we talked a bit about ways to get decent health insurance.

And then today, I come across a very pertinent post on the Consumer Reports Health Blog: "Seven Signs a health plan might be junk."

The title says it all, doesn't it? Here are the major categories, but I suggest you go to the blog and read the story (and the soon-to-be-released investigative report) at the site:

Limited benefits
This is a big one since, CR reports, "In most states those phrases might be your only clue to an inadequate policy."

Low overall coverage limits
Have a coverage limit of $25,000 or even $100,000? You're setting yourself up for bankruptcy if you have a heart attack or even if you develop diabetes.

“Affordable” premiums
"There’s no free lunch when it comes to insurance," states CR. "[I]f your insurance was a bargain, chances are good it doesn’t cover very much." Their answer is similar to Randy's: Look into a comprehensive plan.

No coverage for important things
Some policies don't cover prescription drugs or outpatient chemo, CR reports. But most won't tell you. Uh oh.

Ceilings on categories of care
"A $900-a-day maximum benefit for hospital expenses will hardly make a dent in a $45,000 bill for heart bypass surgery," says CR. "Limits on mental-health costs, rehabilitation, and durable medical equipment should be the most generous you can afford."

Limitless out-of-pocket costs
Get specifics from your plan before you sign on to find out if they have a cap on how much you can pay. "Some policies, for instance, don’t count co-payments for doctor visits or prescription drugs toward the maximum," they say. That was my experience with my high-deductible plan. A nightmare.

Random gotchas
"An AARP policy we looked at began covering hospital care on the second day," CR says. "That seems benign enough, except that the first day is almost always the most expensive, because it usually includes charges for surgery and emergency room diagnostic tests and treatments." Ouch.

Head's up fellow freelancers!

30-Day Economic Stability Challenge: The power of serenity

I'm not a calm person by nature. I like to keep myself in a state of cat-like readiness so I can deal with problems as they come up. There usually aren't enough problems to keep my mind busy, which I think is part of why I enjoy freelancing--at least my fears tend to be real.

That natural nervousness is why I need this challenge. But my serenity practice is what helps me deal with any financial situation, particularly the one I experienced last month when a check from a longtime and cherished client bounced.

My serenity practice usually consists of:

• Eating healthy food;
• Trying to sleep eight hours a night (though I don't always make it);
• Daily 10-20 minutes of mindfulness meditation;
• Daily housecleaning of the mental kind--writing out all my fears and praying to let go of them;
• Regular exercise, including cardio at the gym and yoga; and
• Regular meetings/phone calls with a wide network of other freelancers.

It's a lot of work, but it also pays amazing dividends. I learned this last month, when that check, most of my money for the month, disappeared from my account, leaving me with a negative balance. For one weekend, I had $13.

But I got through it without making it worse. I maintained a positive relationship with my client, I continued to do my work, and I didn't borrow money or use a credit card to get over it. In future posts, I'll explain why that's important for me.

Today, I'll explain how I did it:
I called lots and lots of self-employed colleagues.
There's a place for rage and fear and confusion and hopelessness, but it's not with your clients. I called friends who were Realtors, writers and career coaches. When I had to send a pointed email to my client, I ran it past several more veteran freelancers to make sure it was based in reason, not emotion. I spewed my spleen with my friends and loved ones. I broke down more than once and called friends and colleagues hysterical. But because of my daily serenity work with writing, meditating and yoga, those moments of hysteria were shorter than they've ever been in my life.

I did loving kindness meditation for my client.
I've written about this before, and I know it's the last thing you want to do when you've been wronged despite doing everything right. But the fact is that I just wanted the problem to be solved, and I don't like how I feel when I'm enraged and full of self-pity and self-righteousness. Those aren't feelings I can afford to nurture, so instead I prayed that my client would have everything I wanted for myself. That goes for my bank, too.

I did the paperwork.
When I got the email from my bank saying I had a negative balance, I thought it was a phishing scam. When I realized it was real, I knew just what to do:

• Email my client and ask what happened and for a new check;
• Call the people to whom I'd written checks to see if they had deposited them and if they could hold them. They could. I even called a magazine to whom I'd sent a check and asked them if they could hold it. They couldn't but I tried;
• I called my bank; and
• I transferred funds from other savings accounts to cover myself in the meantime.

I could do all of this because I both knew the checks I had sent and knew where to find their information. Being organized is a godsend in this situation.

I was persistent.
Persistence doesn't just pay off in querying. In a situation like this, willingness to keep showing up for the next piece of bureaucratic monitoring--calling the bank, checking to see when the reissued check would arrive, calling the bank again, visiting the bank--meant the issue got resolved. I did what I could. Then I used my serenity practices to try to let go of the rest.

I exercised.
Even though I was emotionally wrought and just wanted to sleep, I forced myself to keep up my writing, meditating and exercise regimens because I knew they'd help me recover faster. And they did. The writing and exercise helped me express my feelings in constructive ways. The meditating soothed my very frayed nerves. I even added one more meditation practice onto my week for extra care.

I prayed.
I know it sounds hokey (again), but I know in these times to be a self-employed person takes faith. My faith has been shaken by this situation, but I tried to bolster it by practicing gratitude. In my morning writing, after writing about my anger, I focused on the good things I had instead of the things I lacked, and thanked god for them.

Outcome

The result is that my account is flush again, thanks to quick action by my client and my own advocacy with my bank. I also stayed on track with my other clients, kept querying for more work, completed the last blog challenge and continued to meet with friends. I didn't do any of this perfectly, of course, and I definitely felt the need for more sleep. My nerves are still a little shot and I need a day off. But it could have been worse, and I could be feeling much worse now--still resentful, self-righteous and completely distracted from what my clients need from me.

And the best part is that I could see how much support I really have, how strong I've become and learned how much i really know about managing my business.

How do you cope with economic crises?

Photo by zieak.

Reminder: Choose the next 30-Day Challenge

I'm on vacation this week, so posts will be a little more spotty than usual. But don't fear, I'll bring you a few tips on how to maintain serenity in a recession.

In the meantime, I want to remind you that the next 30-Day Challenge will start on the 15th.

What is it? That's up to you.

Comment on this post to have your say on what the next challenge will be.

Choose the next 30-day challenge

It's that time again. Not only is it a new year, full of unique challenges we can't begin to fathom today, but it's time for a new 30-day challenge. I'd love to see in the comments below which of the following challenges you'd like to tackle next?

Financial Challenge

2009 will be a stressful year for most of us, given the state of the world economy. So now's the time to put our finances in order. This challenge will address credit card debt, cashflow issues and other financial freakouts that suck the serenity right out of us.

Marketing Challenge

The key to my success is always marketing, whether that means networking, sending letters of introduction, or generating and reslanting queries. In this challenge, I'll lay out ways to make marketing easier, challenge you to send more queries and maybe even offer a prize to the person who sends the most queries.

Another Self-Care Challenge

The beginning of the year is always a time to come down from the excesses of the holiday season--too much spending, too much eating and too much drinking. So how do we realign and focus for the new year? In this challenge I'll consider some options.

Let me know which you'd like to see--and even feel free to suggest other challenges if none of these spark your interest.

The next challenge will start in mid-January, after I get back from a well-deserved vacation.

Serenity Tips: Links Edition

Clutter, time management, money management, marketing: All a regular part of the business of freelancing. Here are a few of my favorite tips on some of these from around the web. In the future I hope to make these a little more focused.

I wrote last week about how passion has restored my energy and served as a surprising form of self-care. It appears Elaine Appleton Grant had some of the same thoughts. Here are some perhaps surprising tips on improving your writing by switching your writing medium. I especially like "the verb is your adjective." Interesting verbs illuminate reality in a whole new way. Give it a try.

Erica Douglass has a great guest post at the equally great blog Get Rich Slowly about finding more time in your day for the things you want to learn, like finance, decluttering and marketing. Hint: It's not sleep less.

Speaking of sleeping: Cheryl Miller has some great tips for dealing with a bad day. It doesn't have to be the day when an assignment falls through, an editor rejects your carefully crafted idea or when the stock market is about to collapse. It can be simpler than that. Sometimes it's just that being self-employed means we have no limits on our time and our bosses are slave drivers. Here are her tips for recovering from such a day.

Sometimes, though, a bad day at work results from lethargy or lack of energy. Didn't sleep well the night before, too worried about the economy to focus? Try some of Gretchen Rubin's tips for reenergizing yourself and making yourself more productive during tough times.

I know several people have told me that the thing that blocks their serenity the most is a messy, disorganized desk. Well, I'm a neatnik these days--a fact that never ceases to shock my mother, who regularly forced me to clear a path from my door to my bed in high school. Still, if you need to get started on something--decluttering in this case, but it can apply to other tough endeavors as well--consider Unclutterer's gentle but organized approach to getting started on decluttering.